Thursday, April 24, 2014

Why Write Your Own Obituary?

Doris Lloyd looking at obituary collection
Center for Southeast Louisiana
I think this is something that most people really don't want to do. The question is, why not write your own obituary? I think most people become terrified at the thought of death. Facing our own death can be a thought that most of us would like to avoid. "The truth is all of us will die and that is something that we can't avoid." You know exactly what you want said and it will help your family members who are in distress by writing your own obituary.

Losing a family member, relative, friend can be emotional time and the personal who is making the arrangements thoughts can be somewhat cloudy. Your family members are under a lot of stress at the loss and will be overwhelmed with your final arrangement. Writing your own obituary can help reduce some of the stress.

For people who are very organized this is part of their files. I know one person whom wrote their own obituary. "Mrs. Alma Harrison Vernon," when she passed away her daughter honored her mother's wishes and used the  obituary that her mother had written. Jim Rebhorn wrote his own obituary, he wrote in the third person, he explains how each one of his family members loved him.

You should leave your obituary with your insurance policy so that it can easily be found. Often times the person who are writing your obituary may leave out facts and things that you want people to know and remember about you.

Writing your obituary you get to chose what you want said, who you want as the pallbearers and
Celebration of Life
Mary J. Daniels
honorary pallbearers, who you want to handle your services, etc. You also get to talk about the life events that were a part of your life. You will be surprised how many family members who may not know things that their decease relative accomplishments or what they were involved in. They may not know their friends are family members who were dear to them.

Whatever I can do to make it easier on my love ones at the time of my death is what I want to do. It is also a way of taking charge of your own life story. After all it is your life story and you should tell it. Think about it "What would the person who is writing your obituary say?" They can't possibly know more than you. Besides if there is a wish that you want to see carried out write it in your obituary.

If there are any special instructions for your services put it in your files with your obituary and make sure you talk with the person(s) who will be charged of your arrangement and a person who you know will follow your instructions.

Something funny I want to share, "I was talking with my friends and I told them not to dress me in
one of those suits that many ladies wear to church," make sure I have my African attire on. I told them that I would tickle their toes every night if they didn't honor my wishes. My two sons know to make my homegoing celebration the way I lived. African drumming is what I want and certainly let the people who really know me deliver my eulogy, after all those who were around me know me best.

In lieu of flowers, donate the money to a charitable organization of my choice " Gathering of Hearts," because so many people are in need and I can't see the sense of spending money on flower that will die. Providing for those in need is where I want the money to be spent.

Wow, I'm leaving instructions in this blog. Its beautiful when you can face the day that most people are afraid of. Of course I want to live a long but healthy life like everyone else. But let's face it each of must face that day. More people are writing their own obituary. So get started on writing your own obituary and place it in our files.